Day One

On June 26, 2019 I had a mental and emotional breakdown. I made threats to harm myself and I scared my family. I scared them so much that they called 911 the next day and had me admitted into a psych ward. I was evaluated at Good Samaritan Hospital. Afterwards, I was transferred to the psychiatric unit at Norwood Hospital. I was discharged on July 2nd. During my stay, I wrote a series of poems to help me cope. This is the first one…

There are white walls

With tiled floors

The doors & windows

Are all locked 

There is no escape

So I close my eyes

Pretend the air 

Flowing out of the vent

Is a warm breeze

I imagine the bright lights

On the ceiling are instead the sun 

And suddenly I am tanning

At a beach or on a cliff side

In Southern California 

The other people 

Inside the white walls 

Are always talking

But I only listen for her

I reminisce over a sweet tone

How the sound of her voice

Calms me like good music

I play our conversations on repeat

In my head like my favorite song

When I get lonely or afraid

I wrap my arms around myself & sway

Pretend it is her embrace, not my own

This is how I got through day one

Tomorrow, I will do the same

I will run away in my mind 

And dance with my memories

Until I can run away to her

6 thoughts on “Day One

  1. I wish nothing but positive vibes and the ability to sourround yourself with that witch make u smile i also give u love and support because of what u do with ur talent and i appreciate u letting us ride with u in this time of ur life take a deep breath and know i fuck with u tough and every one deserves a break down hear and there so lets build u back up now ya because u are definitely the beezniz ya digg💜

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Dopeeeee I wish I was better with words or at least how to spill them. But I’m not. Lol anyways ur extremely talented keep moving forward in life you got this! Now I understand so I to attempted my life 3 times that I knew about how ever I’m still here and so are you!!!! Keep writing keep shining you definitely have a great purpose in life!!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. This was beautiful. Thank you for normalizing mental health. It’s important to be able to speak up and talk about these things. ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

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